Do They Get Jealous of Me?

All my life, I always noticed that people get jealous of me. I don’t have a big group of friends because I’m scared to trust anyone. I always end up in a situation where people talk behind my back because I was born wealthy, witty and pretty. People whom I considered as friends, which I really do with all my heart, ended up betraying me. When I’m in the verge of success, that’s the time they would tell me that in the first place, they don’t really like me, and so I started to ask myself why. What’s wrong with me? What have I done to them that makes them betray me?

I’m a shy person. I only talk when I need to. I don’t talk, when I don’t know you, not unless you tried to initiate a conversation. At school, as far as I know, most of the time, I always got the highest score from quizzes to final exams, answered all the oral recitations perfectly, got the praises from my professors; I’m always the performer. I don’t talk too much, but when I am asked to answer a question, I always have the answer.

I’m not a party goer. If my classmates go out at night during weekends for a get-together, I don’t join them. Simply because I can’t stand up in a big crowd and I don’t like dancing in the dance floor, I hate loud music and I don’t “drink ’til we die”. At some point, I have this realization that maybe they hate me because of that. I’m not quite sure.

When I graduated college, almost all of them pursued our profession as a Nurse by volunteering. 2% went out our way and took the Call Center career.  I have my own principle that led me to my biggest decision. I strongly believe that nowadays, practicality matters most. I’d rather go for a job where I can eat and live, rather than go for my profession but starve and get jealous for people who could buy all they want. That’s what I believe and I don’t think that my classmates and all other friends I considered see it in a different way.

I go for the job, get a good pay.

I was able to buy my wants and needs. With my job, I bought myself  a laptop and a netbook and a Blackberry phone which is really famous, bought plenty of dresses, shoes and bags and I’m happy. I’m happy with what I have. I live with a very good life, free from the big crisis. I was able to stand on my own because of my job. I have this realization again, that maybe, that’s one of the reason why my closest friend in college hated me.

At work, while on training, my Team Leader becomes one of my closest friend, inside and outside work. We go out for lunch together with my closest buddy, Ate Rose and some of my Team mates. We share stories, experiences, anything under the sun. Just one bad day, I just heard from one of my team mates, that one of my closest friend from the team hates me. She hates me because she thinks that I betrayed her. She like my Team Leader and she thinks that I’m having this affair with him, which is not true. The mess becomes bigger and bigger and I hear a lot of shit talks about me from them. It hurts me.

If you’re ugly, even if you go out with the most handsome guy, they would never put any malice to you at all. They would even say that you’re such a lucky girl. But if you got the looks, finds out that you’re very close to this one guy they find interest with, they will call you a SLUT, which I really don’t understand why. Sometimes, I would just say to myself that maybe because the world is not gonna be fair, so the pain won’t hurt that much.

Can someone give me an answer?

Why do people always get jealous of me?

I always have the issue of trusting FAKE FRIENDS.

2 thoughts on “Do They Get Jealous of Me?

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