Dear Diary

January 22, 2012
05:37 PM
“Cloudy”

Dear Diary,

Todays Kim’s birthday and I’m here locking up myself inside my bedroom. You might thinking, “did you have a fight?”, Well NO, I’m here and she’s there, were miles apart. I tried to watch a movie earlier while she went to church and though the movie was great, the title by the way is “What’s Your Number?”, I can’t help but be lonely. I know, I promised myself that no matter what I’m going to smile. I can’t help it, I’m not there when the most important person in my life is celebrating her 26th year of existence.

I cried myself to sleep. I woke up at 4:30 PM, took my late lunch, open my computer, browse the internet and finally decided to tell you how I am feeling now.

I posted a note on her Facebook, “Happy Birthday, Baby. I feel so lazy today. I want to sleep so I won’t feel lonely. I’m so sorry for not being able to celebrate with you. I hope you’re doing better ’cause I’m so freakin’ worried about you bein’ sick without me to take care of you. I love you and forgive me for having to feel this way, but I’m more than happy that this is your 2nd birthday since I came barging into your life. Your existence is the only thing that matters to me. Please take a lot of care with you all the time. Don’t stressed out yourself with too much work and don’t you ever skip your meal again for that will trigger your ulcer. Please refrain from drinking colas everyday, it isn’t good for your health (too much acid) and don’t forget to hydrate yourself with water, that would cleanse your body, though that’s not gonna be enough, but at least it would help out washed away the acid in your blood. I’m saying this because I’m far away and worrying about you should be the least thing I should do or else I cry myself to sleep while you’re sick and I feel so damn hopeless of not even having the chance to hold your hand while you’re in pain. You’re my strength, my knight (without an armor, haha), my only hope when the world turns it’s back on me, so please take care. I love you so much, Babe.” and here’s another one, “我愛你, אני אוהב אותך, 愛しています, Kocham cię, Я тебя люблю, Jag älskar dig, Ik hou van jou, Ich liebe dich, i love you Kimbb!.”

I can’t help but to miss my Baby. Please bear with me diary. This feeling will pass.

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January 22, 2012
08:12 PM
“Cloudy Night”

Dear Diary,

I’m going back to sleep now ’cause tomorrow’s gonna be my 1st day for the week at work. I’m positive that I can sell a lot today so my Value Points will meet the target before the month will end. I’m also hoping that I have a very good surveys later or else I’m screwed. Goodnight and see you again tomorrow after work!

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January 24, 2012
02:33 PM
“Sunny day”

Dear Diary,

I feel so tired. Every after work I feel like sleeping and sleeping the whole day. I’m a bit depress. I want to eat McDonald’s Fries but it’s too far from here. Lemme think what to write today. By the way, I’ve missed you!

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January 28, 2012
12:34 AM
“Cold Night”

Dear Diary,

I know right, we haven’t talked for a while. Forgive me. I just love to sleep these past few days and that made me feel like I’m a human and not a robot.

It’s my rest day and time flies so fast. Got 3 IR NO’s and that screwed up my metrics but that doesn’t bother me anymore. I followed the process correctly, so I’m guilt-free!

All I wanna do now is relax and take things easy. I don’t wanna drown myself on things that I couldn’t turn back anymore. I’ll just move on ’cause tomorrows gonna be another amazing day.

Although things are pretty much disappointing in the office, I still choose to be happy. Letting happiness win over sadness. Let’s keep moving.

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January 28, 2012
07:15 PM
“Cloudy night”

Dear Diary,

I’m so full. Just ate at KFC just because I want to take a seat at the Mall, haha. Now, I just badly needed internet connection so I’m talking to you right now at McDonald’s, eating spaghetti. I needed to buy something so I could take advantage of the Wifi, haha. Let’s see where my mind takes me tonight.

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January 30, 2012
03:01 PM
“Hot afternoon”

Dear Diary,

Everyone loves this day, who doesn’t? It’s payday. I’m not a bit excited ’cause I’m paying a 20 thousand pesos loan, that means my salary will be deducted for 6 months. Not bad though, I can still pay my rent, bills, and send money to Mom, and just enough money for me to survive up to the next payday. Same cycle for 6 months, and another 1 year cycle for me if I’m really getting a DSLR on my birthday.

I don’t have enough thoughts today. Maybe because my mind is too much preoccupied about a lot of issues lately in the apartment and at work. I’ll get by, it’ll pass.

Despite all the storms, I can still manage to smile because if there’s bad things, there’s good things too. That’s life – you’re not going to cry all your life, there’s always a brighter side.